Dave

3/2/19, 5:50 PM

I don’t know what I was thinking. It was in February, I can’t remember exactly when, but I had decided to give Match.com a go. (Actually, I joined at the end of December…)

Anyway, it wasn’t long before a man, Dave, contacted me. He had the craziest picture as his profile picture. I should have captured it, but I didn’t. He was at the steering wheel of his car wearing a crazy hat, maybe even a bow tie. Now that I think about it, I think the get-up fit him perfectly. (The picture below is what he changed his profile picture to, after I jokingly commented about the one with him wearing the hat.)

You must think I’m crazy, being on Match.com. Well, at first I said I needed to get back on the horse. But now it’s becoming more like research.

I’ve attracted two scammers in less than a total time online of three months. One was very smooth and caught me by surprise (Wright); the other, more recently, dumb and clumsy (Dave). I doubt he’ll get anyone to fall for his schemings. Let’s hope not.

Anyway, I’m dropping off at the end of March. That’s more than enough of that. I’ll let the Lord do my match making directly from now on.

But let’s step back a few weeks and see what Dave was telling me…

One of the initial Match messages to me from Dave on or about 2/16/19:

Charming Dave

“I moved to Oregon 2006 after the loss of my family on the 29th of August 2005 by the incident of Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans… For a fact, life hasn’t really been fair to me since then, I have always had no one to love or care for and no one has ever loved or really cared about me apart from my deceased wife (Mary) & my only son (John) but unfortunately, death stole them away. I moved on though. For I knew God still have a greater plan for us ahead. No matter what we might have been through or be going through at the moment. It’s not the end of the world when there’s life. I believe there’s more to be thankful for and hope for in life. Besides, what have you been up to on here so far? Any luck or experience at all? Dave”

2/17/19, 6:46 PM
The Lord really did it to me today. I was chatting with a guy, Dave, on Match, and he sends me this:
“Oh well, I’m totally new to this platform myslef and haven’t engaged in any healthy or constant communication with none. Maybe that is because I barely show up on here. Though, I’m here seeking companionship, my life partner & soul mate. I mean a positive loving woman with pure beautiful heart and a great sense of humor. To love me for me and I’ll do the same in return, for us to love, live and share the whole rest of our life together as one happy soul in peace and harmony till the very end of time. If you know what I’m talking about.”

I just laughed out loud—for quite a while. I couldn’t believe it.

Okay Lord, I get it. Stay off Match.

2/17/19, 8:36 PM
I just turned off the visibility of my Match profile. Whew!

2/19/19, 2:38 PM
Hmmm… this guy Dave, Match, is a bit of a puzzler. It sounds like a crude attempt at a scam, at this point. Not WW caliber. But, then, I am a lot wiser now. He asked me when my birthday was, which happened to be a few weeks before and I made the mistake of telling him. He then told me his birthday was February 2nd, one day after mine. Too convenient…

His phone is Florida. Says his wife and son died in hurricane Katrina. Hmm.
Says he’s a virologist — independent Consultant. Leaving Monday for Tokyo. Hmmm…

I asked him where in Medford he lives. He gave me a street name, though there was a short pause of a minute or so before he replied. I quickly mapped the street and saw it was on the east side. The street name, by the way, started with an “A.”
I replied that I didn’t know that street, was it east or west Medford?
He responded, “west of Medford.”
Wrong answer! I didn’t say anything to him but I said to myself, “Strike one.”

Omg. He said west! It’s not west, it’s east! He lied to me. I asked how long he’s lived in Medford. He said 13 years! Long enough to know east from west. Smells like a scammer…We’ll see…

Later I googled “street names Medford Oregon.” Guess what? The street Dave had given me was on the first page of the search results.

2/22/19, 7:22 PM
Dave is still in the picture though he’s currently in NY on his way to Tokyo. For 11 days. Hmmm…

Boy, I wish there was a cell phone tracker app. Actually, there are apps but they have to be installed on the phone to be tracked.

If I actually meet him in a couple of weeks, it will be a big plus for him. It’s going to be interesting to see what happens in the next two weeks with Dave.

2/24/19, 7:17 PM
Dave’s already struck out. I only gave him two strikes—that was enough. He dared to send me that “bio” (see below) as his own without even checking it. It reminded me of Wright’s passport copy.

Unbelievable.

I just deleted the Hangouts app I had installed on my phone at his request (against my better judgment, btw). I have a feeling he didn’t want to leave an IP trail by emailing.

I’ll bet that really is his picture.

Here’s Dave’s “bio”

I was born on February 2, 1954, in New York City.
I graduated from Great Neck High School in 1971. While in high school I spent a summer at the Jackson Laboratory’s Summer Student Program in Bar Harbor, Maine, which kindled my teenager’s interest in biology.
I initially decided to major in biology in college but then switched to chemistry. I earned my Bachelor’s degree with high honors at Swarthmore College in 1975. During my college days i spent a summer at the Cold Spring Harbor Laboratories working with Dr. George Baltimore which inspired me to take up molecular biology.
I entered graduate school at Massachusetts Institute of Technology in biophysics but soon my interest shifted to animal virology. I proceeded to take the animal virus course at Cold Spring Harbor, taught by Dr. Richard Edwards and Dr. Franklin Simon. I was highly influenced by Franklin who I joined at the Rockefeller Institute to do my thesis work. I obtained my doctorate in 1979.
I also studied for a while with Dr. Bernard Hurwitz at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine to learn about enzymology.
In 1965, i joined the Salk Institute for Biological Studies, California, as a Research Associate. There i worked in association with Dr. Renato Dulbecco and performed important research on the mechanism of replication of the poliovirus.
Along with my colleagues i discovered the mechanism of proteolytic cleavage of viral polyprotein precursors and demonstrated the importance of proteolytic processing in the synthesis of eukaryotic proteins. One of my major works was the discovery that polio produced its viral proteins as a single large polyprotein that was subsequently processed into individual functional peptides. In 1968, i accepted the position of Associate Professor of Microbiology at the Department of Biology at MIT. One of my colleagues at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies, Christine Huang also moved to MIT and we both worked together on vesicular stomatitis virus (VSV).
Over the course of our work, I and Christine Huang demonstrated that VSV, an RNA virus, reproduced itself by means of an unusual enzyme that copies RNA by a process not involving DNA. Later along the line of work, i married Christine Huang.
After i married my wife Christine in 1981, We had one daughter in 1987. My wife was also a biologist specializing in microbiology and virology. We were married for about 30 years before she passed on May, 2011.
In 1987, I was awarded tenure as a Professor of Biology at MIT, a post that I held until 2007. In 1988, i also became an American Cancer Society Professor of Microbiology.
During the late 1960s and early 1970s i focused on two RNA tumor viruses—Rauscher murine leukemia virus and Rous sarcoma virus—and discovered reverse transcriptase through my experiments. My research work of the 70s unveiled me to pharmaceutical giant companies like Pfizer and Gilead pharmaceuticals. I have been active with Pfizer Pharmaceutical for over a decade. I ought to have been retired but i haven’t found any reason to retire yet especially considering the fact that i’m single and have no one to share my life with if i retire. Now tell me about your self Marguerite (!)
I’m off to bed. I’ll be here to say hello when I’m awake before I head out to the Lab. Look for me at 7 or 8pm your time. Enjoy the rest of your day. Harry.(!)


I don’t think he even read this thing through. He said he was born in 1954. That makes him four years younger than me. The dates in this “bio” are inconsistent with someone that age. And what takes the cake are the names at the bottom. Not Diane or Dave… Marguerite and Harry? Then he tried to tell me his middle name was Harry. Right. How dumb can you get?

Share this: